Female Orangutans Can Now Look for Mates on Tinder at This Popular Zoo

For an orangutan in a zoo, the dating scene is tough. It’s like trying to pick up in a nursing home: it’s slim pickings, and everyone’s staring at you. You gotta feel sorry for our hairier brethren. But things are looking up, and the zoo animal ladies’ night will never be the same again. Now, those damn dirty apes have got their hands on Tinder.

Choosing A Mate

Well, a kind of Tinder, anyway. Zoologists and scientists who look after orangutans have always faced the same problem: how can we make a successful pairing with such a limited number of animals in the one spot? The answer, it turned out, was simple. Just let them choose their partner from anywhere in the world.

The Lucky Lady

The first lucky orangutan to try out the app is an 11-year-old called Samboja. She won’t have to settle for that hairy idiot in the other corner of her enclosure anymore – she’ll have male orangutans from as far away as Singapore to choose from. If it’s anything like the real Tinder, though, as soon as she signs on she’ll be flooded with offers and dick pics.

Trust Those Frisky Dutch

Of course it had to be a Dutch initiative. Those liberal Europeans are always trying to spread the free love, aren’t they? Samboja herself lives at Apenheul Primate Park in The Netherlands, where she says the local bars are “pretty dire”.

How It Works

It’s as simple as Tinder, really. Simbaja is given a tablet preloaded with the dating app, which contains images of potential mates. They might be doing push ups, kissing their biceps, polishing their shitty car without a shirt on, doing stomach crunchs, whatever. Then all she has to do is point and say the magic word: “ook”.

What She’s Looking For

This isn’t just millennials being stupid. A lot of time and research has gone into this study, and the results have been kinda surprising. Orangutans are even more like us than we thought. When looking for someone to take home for the night, it’s mostly looks that gets them through the door. In the ape world, it’s the size of the cheeks that especially makes them go wild. They’d love Kim Kardashian.

The Contenders

As we mentioned, the likely lads hail from all over the globe. Researchers have taken pains to represent as many different looking orangutans as possible, and the resulting Ape Bachelorette contestants is as diverse as an Apple advertisement. Our bet is on Todd. He’s dopey as hell but you could lose a Skittle in those dimples.

Not The First Study

Although this is the first time this kind of technology has been implemented, researchers have tried to tackle the problem before. In a weird webcam-like setup made by – who else – the Germans last year, they manage to get sparks flying between an ape there, Sinta, and a male in Belgium. Ultimately the language barrier was too much, though, and Sinta couldn’t make it down on weekends because she had to pick up her kids from hockey and why don’t you come up here for a change?

We’ve All Been There, Lady

One of the first hurdles that the Dutch researchers had to face was the problem of technology. Just like us, Samboja just couldn’t stop smashing her iPad. After a lot of embarrassed visits to that Chinese guy who does it for cheap down the road, they finally fixed one up with a steel frame. Hang on a second, we just had a great business idea…

French Olympian Gymnast Suffers Gruesome Leg Injury

Every five years every country around the world sets aside their differences and comes together at a chosen location to see who the best of the best is in their respective athletic fields. We’ve already seen Michael Phelps rack up four gold medals making him a record-breaking 26 time gold medalist. We’ve also seen the American gymnastics team dominate every aspect of their field, much respect to Simone Biles. We’ve seen the American basketball squad goof off in a plethora of videos while dominating the competition. Heck, we’ve even seen a pair of Filipino divers horribly fail and score a total of 0.0 on two separate dives. But what happened to this French gymnast is probably the most gruesome injury we’ve seen in recent Olympic history. If you can stomach it, check out the video below.

Yeah, even we flinched watching this man’s leg snap like a twig. On the very first day of the Olympics, this past Saturday, the man you see in the video, Samir Aït Saïd, violently broke his leg during the men’s qualifying round on the vault. Initially, you can see the focus in the Olympian’s eyes before he takes down the aisle, as he sprints, he bounces off the trampoline, completes several complex flips, and in while attempting to land his vault a snap is heard throughout the stadium that silenced and shocked the spectators. Saïd’s left tibia and fibula completely snapped in half and the Olympic medical staffed rushed to his aid to slowly reset his leg as he was hauled off on a stretcher.

Luckily, Saïd is in a stable condition, received surgery immediately, and was recently seen walking around on crutches. He’s in good spirits and is rooting for his French teammates from the sideline. It sucks that such a gruesome injury had to take place on the very first day of the 2016 Summer Olympic games but this should be a reminder to us the dedication and the risks these athletes take, day in and day out to compete at the highest level in the world. With all that being said, we salute you Samir Aït Saïd, we wish you a speedy recovery, and hope to see four years from now from the next Olympic games!

Improve the Quality of Your Sleep By Following These Tips

Unfortunately for many of us, sleep has become a luxury rather than a necessity. What people tend to ignore is that sleep is incredibly important to a variety of things throughout our daily life. According to Campusmindworks.org, “As many as 70 million Americans may be affected by chronic sleep loss or sleep disorders.” If an individual receives poor sleep quality or a lack of sleep, it leads to a lack of motivation, reduced attention span, and overall poor feeling. According to a variety of studies, scientists conclude that the optimal amount of sleep averages between 7-8 hours. Although one may receive a sufficient amount of sleep, it is necessary to understand that “not all sleep is created equal.” The most important thing to think about when changing your sleep habits is to improve the quality of your sleep above all else. Sleep is a cycle of stages, and it is important to


 achieve an adequate amount of rest at each stage in order to feel rested the next morning.

The first thing to address is napping. While most people nap during the day, a nap can either help or harm your sleep at night. In order to ensure that an afternoon nap will not screw up your nightly rest, make sure to nap for only a certain amount of time. An efficient “power nap” should only last about 20-30 minutes at the most. With this short amount of time, you are receiving rest; however, you are not staying asleep long enough to slip into a deeper stage of sleep. It is important to maintain a ritual or routine each morning upon waking and each night before falling asleep. Waking up at the same time every morning allows the body to begin its wake cycles early, making falling asleep easier that night. In addition, having a set, relaxing routine each night signals the brain to start shifting into sleep mode.

When discussing bedtime routines, it is necessary to cut out screens and reduce as much light as possible. With the bright light from a phone or computer (or even the light from a nightlight), the brain is unable to reach all sleep stages efficiently and effectively because the light tells the brain that it is still daytime. In addition, when waking up in the morning, make sure to have a soothing alarm that cannot be easily shut off and ignored. Next up: cut out alcohol, caffeine, and cigarettes. Alcohol has been known to help individuals fall asleep faster; however, alcohol messes up the sleep cycle and stages during the night, therefore decreasing the quality of sleep. Known for its ability to help “wake you up”, it is important to avoid consuming large amounts of caffeine because it actually shorten’s the body’s ability to stay in the deeper stages of sleep during the night. Lastly, cigarettes have been known to actually prevent the initial act of falling asleep altogether. Sleep should be viewed as a necessity in order to achieve optimal function during the day, so make sure to improve both the quantity and quality of your Zzzz’s.

Sewer Pipe Bursts Through Wall And Ends A Family Barbecue In Nasty Fashion

We here at JellyShare have a serious inquiry and public service announcement about the quality and inspection of the piping in your homes and neighborhoods. Seriously, when’s the last time you even thought about the pipes, clamps, and screws that transfer your unwanted waste and water to the proper channels in order for it to be treated…? Exactly, it hasn’t crossed your mind at all, probably since the tragic events of the Flint Water Crisis. We should all keep in mind the maintenance and attention even the crucial parts of our society that might not be in plain sight or under ground. For example, take a look at this group of family and friends enjoying a sunny day cook out and how it took an instantly troubling and smelly turn for the worse.



Usually, silent films are supposed to be funny, semi-complex, with a plot twist… This particular footage did have a plot twist, but it was nowhere near funny or complex and there was no Charlie Chaplin sighting in the 40 second clip. Can you imagine gathering your family and friends for a little fun in the sun, burgers and hot dogs, only for members of your party and the freshments to be swept away by a steaming pile of sewer waste? Welp, that’s exactly what happened here. Also, notice how the gentlemen in the middle of the screen in the white and black shirt noticed something was brewing as the gentleman in the yellow shirt began to move away from the explosive combo of human excrement and neighborhood waste. Let us also point out the fact that an entire wall collapsed during the process and nearly drowned the man in the green shirt as he was the last to escape the poop water. Talk about gag worthy…

We want to know how much pressure those pipes were under in order for an entire wall to come down, if the survivors were forced to get any shots, and if the group there is still friends with the guy who threw that cook out. For those that were able to escape through the narrow passageway at the bottom of the screen, which we personally believe were the most athletic, way to stay on your toes and come out unscathed. As for those the victims that were nearly drifted off by liquid feces, like a river scene in an action flick, may God be with you and we wish you a full recovery from the trauma you have suffered.

This Man Spent His Entire Life Savings Trying To Look Like Justin Bieber

The story of Toby Sheldon is packed full of more twists and turns than a ride at Disneyland. From the fleeting dreams of a talented youth to a tragic end, his is a life that never stopped being strange. What did he do deserve all this? It was a simple wish: he just wanted to look like Justin Bieber…

Born In Germany

In a different life, we may never heard about Toby Sheldon. He was born in Cologne, in south-western Germany, as Tobias Strebel. With a happy childhood and naturally good looks, he could have been anything. But one day, his whole life changed…

Finding His Inspiration

The reason for his change was all thanks to the baby-faced megastar, Justin Bieber. The Canadian’s insane success from an early age had reached the shores of Germany, and Toby was transfixed by his fame and good looks. He decided that he wanted to look just like him, at any cost…

He Paid How Much?

Tobias’ transformation to Toby “Bieber” Sheldon was complete. Only in his early twenties at the time, he spent over $100,000 on plastic surgery and enhancements to become the person he thought he was always destined to be. He begged, borrowed, and sunk everything he had, and literally came out of it a new man.

The Reality TV Star

It’s not every day that someone goes under the knife to become just like a celebrity. His story was discovered by TV producers in the States, and within a few short months everyone was begging to get a look into the strange mind of Toby. Episodes dedicated to him were featured on Botched and My Strange Addiction, and he was soon a reality TV star.

Moving To Hollywood

The thing about Toby Sheldon was that he wasn’t just a faker. He was a songwriter in his own right, and with his new face he was ready to follow his dream. So he went to where all dreams go to soar: Los Angeles. Living there for five years, he found everything he had always dreamed of. And some things he wasn’t expecting…

Sticks And Stones

There was some trouble in paradise. It’s a crazy old world, and some crazy old people don’t actually like Justin Bieber, or seeing other people and their quirks succeed. For years he suffered online and verbal abuse from the haters, who couldn’t understand his unique obsession.

Making It Big

But that didn’t stop his rise to the top. Unlike other celebrity wannabes, Toby found a way to really make his fame pay, and he was in constant demand to perform Bieber tribute concerts and even his own original material. Money was pouring in, but with the cash came more problems…

Just Like Justin

Toby’s transformation into Justin, it seemed, was more than just skin deep. He followed Bieber’s wild partying ways and started to emulate them himself. Flush with cash and with the superstar’s good looks, Toby found himself plunged into that same world of drugs, epic parties, and tragic romance.

His Tragic Death

On August 21st, 2015, Toby Sheldon was found dead in a motel room in the San Fernando Valley. The news came as a terrible shock to the world, who had been following his unique career for many years. Initially, coroners believed that the death was a suicide, fueled by the recent break-up with his boyfriend. But the truth was far sadder…

A Lethal Cocktail

Toby’s hard partying ways had finally become the end of him. As medical examiners discovered in 2016, his death wasn’t a suicide at all but an overdose from several different illegal drugs, all consumed at the same time. From bizarre beginning to devastatingly sad end, Toby’s life had been nothing short of unique.